bleh, cc com is over le, so i guess i shall blog on it.

went to HTA with plenty of time to spare. once we walked in can already feel the tension sia O.O. then yeah around 9 + went into the competition area. 3 months of training just for that 10 minutes man xP. feeling super nervous la, cos in morning last training the hemp got problem then flagstaff super slow. okok then competition started liao, starting tieing the flagstaff as usual, this time the hemp good quality so tied it well^^. in the end we were abit slower than usual but its ok de la. flagstaff was almost perfect except for the peg hitting the brick and the flag got caught by the flagline, appealed for the first one liao. and omfg! for the first time ever in 3 months of training the clove hitch nv slip xD. yay and we loved the hemp so much we brought it back with us xD and the ponchos too ( can kope de la, not stealing). gadget and basha compromised on alot of twine la, even after compromising so much still used 3 penalty twine which minus alot of points. our basha looks nice except one side triangle not up =X. then i think gadget worst la, gave up on alot of things so as to have enough twine. arghh if have more twine we will surely be damn good la. also the mallet broke upon the first whack -_-. own personal opinion still got chance i guess? hope so la. 3 months of training must be worth it de lor.

after that went to chua chu kang, feeling tired. despite my cough i bravely went to at fast food xD. and even wanted to eat ice cream ^^. then walked inside arcade wearing my np tee, then got chased out. next time i dun want to do sth like that liao, super kao bei -_-. then went to play bowling with squadmates, which i got a really really super high score of 30 points xD. they still say want play laser quest la, i totally broke liao xP. then went home with raymeo. TIRED AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! freak man, cc com totally drained me liao -_- especially with the mood everybody's been having.

dunno how to blog bout this leh. still don't feel right. like now that i know more people i'm becoming more withdrawn la. i dunno how to talk anymore, but since when did people need to think how to talk? when a thought passes through my mind, i'm already judging whether i should say it or not. what kind of consequence would it have. the judging is just like a flash and its over. sometimes i choose to rephrase my words or not say anything at all. maybe even my will and feelings? why should i decide whether what i'm feeling is correct or wrong, or how i should think? maybe i'm just too sensitive, or i'm thinking too much again. most probably the latter, or maybe even both. not like i can't speak my mind can. in 2e like suanned each other on a daily basis =X. so why am i controlling myself now? moderation. we do things even if we know the consequence, thats our nature, to strive forward. nothing will happen if you are just scared of the consequences all day right? i need to have better judgement^^ as somebody who once told me should be flexible la. not as in being rash la. i'm really scared of the day when everything just reduces to hellos and goodbyes. now, my effort seems ever so futile. is it enough? has it ever been enough from the start? even if its not, i will never give up man, because its just too precious to lose, no matter what.

arghh, i'm just bottling up too much stuff inside of me man. if you read till here thank you very much xD. i seriously need to fa xie can. if can i will take up some sort of martial arts for the NYAA thingy xD.

i still remember the last day of school where we stood crying and crying and waving goodbye but none of us ever wanting to leave. its sad, but it just proves how much we bonded over the 2 years.