Sometimes like now I feel loneliness. Actually I have been feeling loneliness for quite some time? A feeling like I have nobody to confide in. Or rather a feeling like I don't want to burden my friends. Like i'm always so gloomy and depressed. But i seriously am. More than one person has told me like why do i always seem so depressed, and another said that i look like i always seem weighed down by life. I guess I have been feeling like this for a long time, ever since school stopped? With lesser friends around me to support me and give me encouragement I feel really weak. I feel burdensome to my friends sigh. I really think it is easy to tell that i'm really gloomy. People just treat me like I am an introvert and yeah 'he's quiet cos he's introverted'. I'm not quiet because i'm introverted. I'm quiet because I am quiet. I'm quiet because i do not feel comfortable, because i don't feel the connection with you all.

I guess it is this point in time that I feel that i don't trust my friends. Trust in the friendship. And not be so conscientious of how burden I think I am. Am i really broken? To have so little faith in life and in myself. To be so plagued by my own insecurities.

So sick of having to be strong. So sick of having to meet expectations. So sick of the fear of being inadequate, that brings me back to playing this farce again. Can i be weak without being judged or condemned? And stay weak? Even if I never got up again. Would you still stand by my side?